The silence of the mountains
Crackles within the burning wood
It screams into your city-honed mind
Myriad sounds that terrify and uplift
Chirping birds and sounds of “home”
Warm the fluttering heartache within you
Into throes of a welcoming sun.
The flapping wings of a bird flitting past
Remind you of your relished solitude
While the solitary mountain woman’s chores
Resonate methodically against the oncoming storm.
Mountain girl problems? Against all this?
They’re a fistful of snow.
22 leopards growl and grunt and I walk on, knowing they see
me.
Srunching on dried oak leaves and mossy rocks, I move on.
Now, a bear threatens life as well. Oh well, thank god for
pokey walking sticks.
Mountain girl problems. Chopping firewood too hardy for soft
palms, too brittle for a hardy mind.
Squeezing toothpaste from a frozen tube while whitened hands
refuse to move
Much like you, when you walked away.
Leaving a frozen shadow of you behind.
Walking along forest trails that are my new friends.
The moss that looks like mistletoe, and I kiss a dying red
flower under it.
The trees that quietly watch me pass, whispering amongst
themselves.
The men, oh the men here. Puffing beedis, chewing paan and
wondering
If this girl needs city doctor help. It is crazy to live
alone in a tiny cottage
That gets snowed in for over 8 days after the first snow
fall.
Mountain girl problems. Controlling the urge to eat when
provisions deplete.
Controlling the joy of seeing new faces, wanting to hug them
for visiting.
Trying hard not to thrash people who say, “you’re so lucky
to live here”.
They know not, what solitude brings. They know not, of the
hunger of wild animals.
Mostly, the problems involve strength and temperament.
Mostly, I spend days lifting bucketfuls of water for weight
training.
And racing sessions with my dog.
Mostly, I spend evenings wondering what Delhi is up to, when
I am in bed by 730pm.
Mountain girl problems, they are many and they are few.
In the end, my fate is decided by the Camus kaleidoscope
that asks me,
“Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee?”
